Me Time

The husband and I made a kind of agreement:

When we got back together and found out we would be moving to Japan and he would not be riding boats during this tour.  Our entire relationship has been awesome because he goes on these little trips on submarines now and then and I get some time to myself.  It’s just something that helps keep my sanity in check.  A little “me time”.

Me Time usually consists of:

  1. Doritos
  2. Chili or Refried Beans and salsa dip
  3. Three or four rental movies, usually scary mixed in with some romantic comedy – things the husband doesn’t care for
  4. Comfy pajama type attire
  5. Sometimes a bubble bath
  6. Sometimes a diy pedicure/manicure
  7. Misc pamper me things that may come up

So, with our moving to Japan and losing the few days to myself every couple of months or so we made an agreement that anytime I needed a night to myself he would bounce off to a hotel and I am trying to request these when the coincide with a pub crawl or something that he can go have fun doing.  And anytime he needs a guy night, I will not question it and even get a hotel myself if he wants it.  It’s just time away, respecting each other’s space and it helps keep our appreciation of each other present.

I’ve just never been the type of woman who needs to be with her partner 24/7.  I also trust him to be out without me as long as I hear from him now and then throughout the night.  I’m probably one of the few spouses that doesn’t call her husband at work, too.  Well, unless there is really something important to discuss, which is super rare.  I may have called him at work five times in the last 10 years.

All of the above, yet I can get very possessive of him.  I can’t explain that.

So, me time…is great!  I love a day/night where I can just be a slob and not have anyone see it.  Be girly if I feel the need and not have anyone see it.  Just do whatever.  The downside is the next day.  Usually, the day after brings bloating, sluggishness, heartburn, and a bit of an emotional roller coaster of wondering if I should have gone out with him the night before, hoping he had fun but not too much fun without me.  Then by mid morning, he comes home and everything evens out.  Life resumes it’s normal course and I feel satiated for a couple of months.

I believe this time for ourselves keeps our marriage healthy, happy and in perspective.


This afternoon we are going to Yokohama for our monthly pub crawl and touring the Kirin factory.  Should be a decent time.  I’ll report more on that after.

How do you take “me time” ?

12 thoughts on “Me Time

  1. I agree that “me time” is essential! I once asked my sister-in-law if she wanted to come out for drinks with the girls, and she actually said “No, your brother and I don’t do anything w/o the other.” (Well, except have an affair and get pregnant, she DID do that w/o him…but I digress…) I was floored. We need our own, unjudged time!

    Now, my “me time” is when I’m gone for the weekends shooting MMA. I love it.

  2. Interesting. I think time away is healthy, necessary for a marriage.

    My me time usually involves a bicycle. My friends. A guy weekend on bicycles. I am not sure my wife would be as calm as you if I were away by myself.

  3. I feel like this is the sort of arrangement I’ll need when I’m married. I love hanging out with the boy but I am introvert down to my very core/need to be able to not wash my hair or put on a bra and watch trashy TV for a few days in a row.

    1. It’s working well for us. Keeps us from getting sick of each other. haha Have to have the trust there though, can’t send him out for a night and get squirly wondering what he’s up to. That is counter-productive yeh? To prevent that we make sure to text each other to check in and send love.

      We only do one night really but he goes to visit his kids a couple times a year and I don’t usually go – expensive. So, I get a couple of weeks to myself then. When he returns it’s all mushy over here for a while.

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