Well I managed to survive the week of June without much incident. From Father’s Day through the 20th was a tough week and is every year, so much so that the rest of June seems incredibly insignificant.
The Solstice came and went without much fuss and to my disappointment. I do this to myself. My list of things to do for self-improvement and personal growth is long and continues to grow yet I am not actually sitting down to do any of them. Aside from reading more and friendship strengthening (I hope), I’ve not accomplished or really set things in motion to accomplish most of my goals for this year. I get excited and amp’d up for these things then I just fall back into the old routine. In October 2013 I set out to make some changes, what a friend calls “seed work” and I have not been taking care of the seed I planted. The surface of the seed I have accomplished mostly but the meat of it has gotten away.
Something needs to happen to spur me into being a do-er and not just a list-er.
My current list – results:
- Read more, TV less – slightly working on this but it isn’t helping my lazy.
- Meditate – not even tried in months.
- Altar and ritual – not touched it in months aside from my friend adding a lovely figurine to it.
- Work out 5 times per week – maybe 2 times if I focus.
- Learn Japanese – haven’t really started on that yet but have something possibly lined up to start in August.
- Strengthen friendships – I’ve worked on this some, opening up more.
- Being pretty – I am slowly working on this with allowing my paycheck to cover a manicure and maintaining a fun hairstyle. To simply like how I look.
- Embrace domesticity – my house could be cleaner.
- Bust Diabetes – I’ve not been eating as well as I should/could be.
That’s what I have so far. Need major do it power to replace wish for it power.
What I intend to do now is to use July, August and September to put into place a completely new routine. From wake up to fall asleep, my day will be different then it is today (other than work and ombudsman obligations of course). The last week of June I am going to start cutting away habits that are counter-productive and setting myself on a daily schedule. No excuses. If I’m injured I will find a workout I CAN do. If it’s raining I have rain boots and an umbrella. If it’s unbearably hot outside, push through it. There are only a couple of shows on T.V. that I actually truly watch, the rest are fillers, the T.V. will stay off all other times. The counter does not need to be crowded to do the dishes nor the hamper overflowing to do laundry. Cutting portion sizes a bit more and opting away from white carbs more. Not be judgmental, even in jest.
It’s way past time to get strict with myself and force the changes I want to make.